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"I awaken. I consume oxygen, then bacon, eggs and black coffee, then my wife, then bacon." -Nick Offerman, on the manliest of morning routines
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Overly manly man? You mean little Nancy?
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Get your god damn life together.
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There's only one thing I hate more than lying: skim milk. Which is water that's lying about being milk
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"I awaken. I consume oxygen, then bacon, eggs and black coffee, then my wife, then bacon." -Nick Offerman, on the manliest of morning routines
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I'M RON SWANSON and you better be at Young Life costume Club tonight!
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The f*ck is a German muffin??
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Get your god damn life together.
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