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I don't always run into my exes but when I do, I'm wearing something they bought me
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I don't always feel like i did well on a final but when I do, it turns out i bombed the shit out of it
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I don't always fart in my office with the door closed but when I do, somebody immediately comes in to ask a question
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I don't always get drunk at parties but when I do, i dont talk about it for a fucking week
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I don't always lie to my kids but when I do, its about a fat man that magically fits down the chimney and brings them presents
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I don't always go to college high but when I do, it's because i have art or philosophy
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I don't always use the lords name but when i do, its in vain
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I don't always log in to youtube but when I do, it's to down vote Rick Perry
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I don't always do work at work but when I do, it's because reddit is down
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