Your spray tan didn't last?

Your spray tan didn't last? - YOUR SPRAY TAN DIDN'T LAST? FALSE. YOU DIDN'T EXFOLIATE. IT LASTED AS LONG AS I EXPECTED UNDER THE CIRCUMSTANCES. Schrute

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LOVE IS ALL YOU NEED? FALSE. YOU NEED WATER AND RATIONS.

LOVE IS ALL YOU NEED? FALSE.  
YOU NEED WATER AND RATIONS.

Fact: You don't "believe" in evolution. you accept it.

Fact: You don't

Do you have a date for Valentines Day? Yes. February 14th

Do you have a date for Valentines Day? Yes.
February 14th

"i'm sexy and i know it" False. sex appeal is subjective

"There's Women's Studies but no Men's Studies? False. Men's Studies is called history

"Life always gives you another chance. It's called 'tomorrow'" False. the end of your life will result in a discernable lack of tomorrow.

Fact: No one has ever gotten laid using the phrase "the narwhal bacons at midnight."

Fact: No one has ever gotten laid using the phrase

"I had countless memorable nights in 2011..." False. You could have only had 365 memorable nights in 2011 - You can count to 365.

christmas is a holiday created for a time to be with family! False. it was created by roman pagans as a week long period of lawlessness

christmas is a holiday created for a time to be with family! False.
it was created by roman pagans as a week long period of lawlessness

Santa used rudolph's bright red nose to guide him through the fog. False. The red light would reflect off the fog and further impair visibility

Santa used rudolph's bright red nose to guide him through the fog. False.
The red light would reflect off the fog and further impair visibility
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