I'm going to die alone in this pit of an apartment

I'm going to die alone in this pit of an apartment - BOSS SENDS ME HOME FROM WORK BECAUSE I'M SICK CAME IN BECAUSE MY COWORKERS ARE THE ONLY PEOPLE I CAN COUNT ON TO CALL AN AMBULANCE IF I CHOKE ON MY PHLEGM Forever Alone

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Have not seen friends in three weeks friends tell me about how great there lives have been in the past three weeks

Have not seen friends in three weeks friends tell me about how great there lives have been in the past three weeks

phone has been dead in pocket for 3 days didn't notice and no missed calls

phone has been dead in pocket for 3 days didn't notice and no missed calls

Plays Frisbee with A BOOMERANG

Plays Frisbee with A BOOMERANG

sees jehovah's witnesses walking past his house

sees jehovah's witnesses  walking past his house

Goes to see the statue of liberty can now say he has been inside a woman.

Goes to see the statue of liberty can now say he has been inside a woman.

Has sex dream gets rejected in it

Has sex dream gets rejected in it

"We all had a friend like this." That Must have been nice.

Drops soap in prison Still a virgin

Drops soap in prison Still a virgin

mom finds your condoms lets you know they've expired

mom finds your condoms lets you know they've expired

Only drinks Socially 40 years sober

Only drinks Socially 40 years sober
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