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Grandma made brownies got to lick the spoon
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new iphone has panoramic photos can finally send dick pics to the ladies
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Alarm set for 8 am didn't go off Fire alarm goes off at 8:05 Am
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Went back to bed for ten minutes after alarm went off Finished awesome dream
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Cheating EX-girlfriend Sees me getting digits from a hot girl
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Work at store for 5 days Asked to be assistant manager
249,137 shares
Did interview over skype Didn't need to put on pants
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Share a name with a celebrity employers can't google me
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Saved up for a new macbook Bought an equivalent Pc and a car instead
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