Oh Boy I really

Oh Boy I really - MY PARENTS DON'T SPEAK ENGLISH. WHEN THEY ASK ME HOW TO SAY SOMETHING - I GIVE THEM MADE-UP WORDS & THEN DIE LAUGHING WHEN THEY TRY TO CONVERSE WITH ENGLISH PEOPLE. Confession Bear

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I have never once told anyone that someone said hi

I have never once told anyone that someone said hi

I have no sympathy for people who complain about being in the army they signed up for it, they are getting paid for it, they knew what they were getting into

I have no sympathy for people who complain about being in the army they signed up for it, they are getting paid for it, they knew what they were getting into

Sometimes when I'm on a crowded subway train I imagine what would happen if I just punched a random person

Sometimes when I'm on a crowded subway train I imagine what would happen if I just punched a random person

whenever my wife asks "guess how much it cost" i double my real guess so she feels better about how much she paid

whenever my wife asks

If you wear a flat-billed hat I automatically think you're a douche bag

If you wear a flat-billed hat I automatically think you're a douche bag

Whenever my girlfriend shows me something funny from the internet I pretend I haven't already seen it on reddit so she doesn't feel bad

Whenever my girlfriend shows me something funny from the internet I pretend I haven't already seen it on reddit so she doesn't feel bad

When i see a fat person walking to a car i watch to see how much the car dips when they get in

When i see a fat person walking to a car i watch to see how much the car dips when they get in

I think girls that don't wear make-up are sexier than girl that do

I think girls that don't wear make-up are sexier than girl that do

If you don't use your turn signal I automatically assume you're a douchebag in every other aspect of your life.

If you don't use your turn signal I automatically assume you're a douchebag in every other aspect of your life.

My family and friends think I'm happy but i'm still depressed and miserable most of the time

My family and friends think I'm happy but i'm still depressed and miserable most of the time
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