schrute sassypants

schrute sassypants - #SASSYPANTS  Schrute

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You know what's better than a triceratops? Only every other dinosaur that has ever existed.

You know what's better than a triceratops? Only every other dinosaur that has ever existed.

A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush? FALSE. Birds in the bush have not been weighed and thus they are impossible to appraise.

A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush? FALSE.  
Birds in the bush have not been weighed and thus they are impossible to appraise.

"One should never use one-word sentences" False.

what goes up must come down? false. an object with sufficient velocity will escape the earth's gravitational field

what goes up must come down? false.
an object with sufficient velocity will escape the earth's gravitational field

I need a new hot water heater FALSE. Hot water doesn't need to be heated

I need a new hot water heater FALSE.  
 Hot water doesn't need to be heated

Milk's favorite cookie? FALSE. Milk is inanimate and is thus incapable of picking favorites.

Milk's favorite cookie? FALSE.  
Milk is inanimate and is thus incapable of picking favorites.

God loves you False: If he was a perfect being he would be devoid of irrational emotions.

God loves you False: If he was a perfect being he would be devoid of irrational emotions.

ICE COLD WATER? FALSE. IF IT WAS AS COLD AS ICE, IT WOULD BE ICE.

ICE COLD WATER?  FALSE.  
IF IT WAS AS COLD AS ICE, IT WOULD BE ICE.

Life is short... FALSE. It's the longest thing you do.

Life is short... FALSE.  
It's the longest thing you do.

IT'S A SMALL WORLD AFTER ALL? FALSE. EARTH'S SURFACE AREA IS 148,940,000 SQUARE MILES.

IT'S A SMALL WORLD AFTER ALL? FALSE.  
EARTH'S SURFACE AREA IS
148,940,000 SQUARE MILES.
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