Kisses your balls before bed "I just kissed the kids goodnight."

Kisses your balls before bed

487,663 shares

How could you have possibly had a good time if i wasn't there too?

How could you have possibly had a good time if i wasn't there too?

I scheduled an appointment for you.. to get a reverse vesectomy so we can have babies

I scheduled an appointment for you.. to get a reverse vesectomy so we  can have babies

There's a girl in your study group? I'll come too!

There's a girl in your study group? I'll come too!

Likes your status From 6 months ago

Likes your status From 6 months ago

Who are you texting? I'm right here with you

Who are you texting? I'm right here with you

You cheated on me? I'll forgive you if you help me bury the body

You cheated on me? I'll forgive you if you help me bury the body

I want to write my name on a rock and hurl it at you so you can feel how much it hurts to miss you

I want to write my name on a rock and hurl it at you so you can feel how much it hurts to miss you

I had a dream we broke up and I killed your family lol

I had a dream we broke up and I killed your family lol

Another girl liked your status? I blocked her for you

Another girl liked your status? I blocked her for you

It took you 10 minutes to get home google maps says it takes 8. who is she.

It took you 10 minutes to get home google maps says it takes 8. who is she.
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