314,078 shares
I want to push you down the stairs so you break your legs and call in Then i could cuddle you allllll day
140,955 shares
Comes over for sex Takes the condom when she leaves
409,644 shares
Wow, We've been dating for nine months. We could have had a baby by now.
231,936 shares
I'm making you something really nice for your birthday A baby
385,942 shares
IF we ever adopt, it has to be a boy I don't want you losing interest in me
136,045 shares
I tell all my girlfriends you have a tiny penis so none of them will hit on you
343,266 shares
you're not allowed to wear sunglasses because i need to be able to see if you're looking at other girls
815,467 shares
I got you a GPS car tracking device for your birthday so if you ever get lost I can find you
240,988 shares
i know that you were ordering your food but i hate that you were talking to the waitress
197,465 shares
I'm angry because you gave that girl more attention than me. Even if it was medical attention.
367,313 shares
Laugh more daily
Loading