135,774 shares
I Said I Wanted to Upgrade to a Larger Vehicle He Laughed and Said I had a Small Dick
11,538 shares
I asked him to make me a grilled cheese sandwich He burnt down the house
33,150 shares
"I think our neighbour is dead, should i call the police?" "Hold on, let me ask what reddit thinks first."
43,934 shares
"It's late. Why won't you come to bed?" "Can't sleep, the British are coming!"
532,708 shares
I wanted a picture of our kids hung on the wall He put up a picture of a stranger's dog for karma
40,883 shares
I thought he wanted a "Day of sex" He just wanted deus ex.
37,345 shares
I asked him to see things from my point of view He looked out the kitchen window
44,999 shares
I wanted to watch a movie with him HE told me to call him after the first 30%.
57,417 shares
I found out I was pregnant. He's already calling the child "Stormageddon."
16,100 shares
I told him we should go for a romantic boat ride He flipped our coffee table over and strapped an engine to it
21,768 shares
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