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Make eye contact with someone at work Fuck, they know im high
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CTRL+C CTRL+C, CTRL+C, CTRL+C
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Can't find car within 15 seconds It was stolen
14,385 shares
Dog barks while I'm in shower, then stops Murderer just killed her... I'm next
21,338 shares
internet goes out fbi is about to raid
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Slow day at work i'm going to be fired
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About to drive home alone at night checks backseat for serial killer
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girl doesn't text back in five minutes she hates me
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put wallet in pocket pat pocket to make sure it's still there
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can't find childhood friend on Facebook he's dead
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