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Parker, you know my favorite brand of rice? no, what? Uncle Ben's.

Parker, you know my favorite brand of rice? no, what? Uncle Ben's. JJ Jameson
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107,447 shares

Drink bottle of red wine health conscious

Drink bottle of red wine health conscious Foul Bachelor Frog
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9,549 shares

Has drunk sex with best female friend still talks to her next day

Has drunk sex with best female friend still talks to her next day Good Guy Greg
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12,634 shares

barely knows you "You would."

barely knows you
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7,923 shares

Caught in an earthquake Stays perfectly still

Caught in an earthquake Stays perfectly still Awesome Michael J Fox
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25,388 shares

I love the look on your face as your eyes adjust to the dark...

I love the look on your face as your eyes adjust to the dark... Horrifying Houseguest
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23,968 shares

"hey, brah, let me just show you this objective reality for a second" shows you subjective reality
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17,869 shares

Therapist: Tell me the biggest thing you accomplished this week. Me: I made it to the front page of reddit! Therapist: What's reddit? Me: The thing preventing me from accomplishing anything else.

Therapist: Tell me the biggest thing you accomplished this week. Me: I made it to the front page of reddit! Therapist: What's reddit? Me: The thing preventing me from accomplishing anything else. Socially Awkward Penguin
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14,148 shares

Spent $300 on textbooks 3 months ago? Best I can do is $20

Spent $300 on textbooks 3 months ago? Best I can do is $20 Pawn Star
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15,567 shares

ICE COLD WATER? FALSE. IF IT WAS AS COLD AS ICE, IT WOULD BE ICE.

ICE COLD WATER? FALSE. IF IT WAS AS COLD AS ICE, IT WOULD BE ICE. Schrute
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23,836 shares