I don't always eat waffles for breakfast But when I do, I compulsively fill every visible waffle-pocket with syrup

I don't always eat waffles for breakfast But when I do, I compulsively fill every visible waffle-pocket with syrup  The Most Interesting Man In The World

Complained about how hard my life is to my husband who called from Afghanistan Got disconnected by a rocket attack before I could finish

Complained about how hard my life is to my husband who called from Afghanistan Got disconnected by a rocket attack before I could finish  First World Problems

I draw dicks on cars in the school parking lot I'm a teacher

I draw dicks on cars in the school parking lot I'm a teacher  Confession Bear

Sometimes when I'm mad at mom I step on cracks on purpose

Sometimes when I'm mad at mom I step on cracks on purpose  Confession Bear

I'll have you know that I got my first pair of contact lenses yesterday And I was only an hour late to work this morning

I'll have you know that I got my first pair of contact lenses yesterday And I was only an hour late to work this morning  Tough Spongebob

Too weird for the cool kids Too cool for the weird kids

Too weird for the cool kids Too cool for the weird kids  First World Problems

Don't plagiarize! Google one of her homework questions and find the answers to the entire worksheet, because she copied it all from the internet.

Don't plagiarize! Google one of her homework questions and find the answers to the entire worksheet, because she copied it all from the internet.  Unhelpful High School Teacher

Zeus doesn't count as a god he's only mythological

Zeus doesn't count as a god he's only mythological  Sheltering Suburban Mom

TOLD A COUPLE AT THE PUB THAT I WAS THE OWNER THEY LEFT WITHOUT PAYING

TOLD A COUPLE AT THE PUB THAT I WAS THE OWNER THEY LEFT WITHOUT PAYING  Evil Plotting Raccoon

Be very careful how you handle a Westboro Baptist Protest A significant portion of their funding comes from winning lawsuits

Be very careful how you handle a Westboro Baptist Protest A significant portion of their funding comes from winning lawsuits  Actual Advice Mallard