i see you shaved i'm sorry the weight of being a man was too much for you

i see you shaved i'm sorry the weight of being a man was too much for you  overly manly man

drives below the speed limit in fast lane speeds up when you try to pass

drives below the speed limit in fast lane speeds up when you try to pass  Scumbag Steve

The general public used to get their information from the network news Now the network news gets their information from the general public

The general public used to get their information from the network news
 Now the network news gets their information from the general public  Sudden Clarity Clarence

guy next to me in the elevator farts bless you

guy next to me in the elevator farts bless you  Socially Awkward Penguin

If you are single and moving into an apartment with a couple don't

If you are single and moving into an apartment with a couple don't  Actual Advice Mallard

Whenever the cleaning guy at work comes near my cube I pretend to do work, because I'm ashamed that he's working his ass off and I'm on reddit.

Whenever the cleaning guy at work comes near my cube I pretend to do work, because I'm ashamed that he's working his ass off and I'm on reddit.   Confession Bear

If you tell your girlfriend she should watch Harry Potter because she already believes in talking snakes You're gonna be single

If you tell your girlfriend she should watch Harry Potter because she already believes in talking snakes  You're gonna be single  Captain Hindsight

playing music on phone in public takes headphones out to make sure not playing out loud

playing music on phone in public takes headphones out to make sure not playing out loud  Paranoid Parrot

My local news station just announced that they fired their lead anchor Apparently, he was really weighing down the show

My local news station just announced that they fired their lead anchor Apparently, he was really weighing down the show  Bad Joke Eel

Not sure if I lost weight Or jeans have stretched from wearing for 4 consecutive days

Not sure if I lost weight Or jeans have stretched from wearing for 4 consecutive days  Futurama Fry