I don't always have a fake argument in my head, but when I do, I feel really smart

I don't always have a fake argument in my head, but when I do, I feel really smart   The Most Interesting Man In The World

Oh, you're condescending and witty on the internet? I bet that confidence translates well into the real world

Oh, you're condescending and witty on the internet? I bet that confidence translates well into the real world  Condescending Wonka

"The rich earned their money through hard work, you shouldn't tax them." Rich because she married and divorced a doctor

Let's take all the crumbs from nature valley bars and end world hunger

Let's take all the crumbs from nature valley bars and end world hunger  Push it somewhere else Patrick

Oh, you use chopsticks at panda express? you must be very cultured

Oh, you use chopsticks at panda express? you must be very cultured  Condescending Wonka

What if all of the lint we find in the lint trap is actually the cremated remains of all of our missing socks?

What if all of the lint we find in the lint trap is actually the cremated remains of all of our missing socks?  conspiracy keanu

What if rocks are actually animals that are so evolved that they tricked our senses into thinking they're inanimate

What if rocks are actually animals that are so evolved that they tricked our senses into thinking they're inanimate  conspiracy keanu

You play B-Ball? Why no play A-ball?

You play B-Ball? Why no play A-ball?  High Expectations Asian Father

What if the washer is the one that's been losing our socks and we've been blaming the dryer all these years?

What if the washer is the one that's been losing our socks and we've been blaming the dryer all these years?  conspiracy keanu

takes pc in for repair brings monitor, mouse and keyboard too

takes pc in for repair brings monitor, mouse and keyboard too  Tech Impaired Duck