sees that you're holding the door for him walks faster

sees that you're holding the door for him walks faster  Good Guy Greg

Sees computer repair technician trying to rip you off fixes your computer on the spot for free

Sees computer repair technician trying to rip you off fixes your computer on the spot for free  Good Guy Greg

Finds nothing that can be prepared in under 2 minutes starves

Finds nothing that can be prepared in under 2 minutes starves  Foul Bachelor Frog

"May i go to the bathroom?" "is it an emergency?"

I don't always sing popular songs out loud but when I do, I mumble during the verses

I don't always sing popular songs out loud but when I do, I mumble during the verses  The Most Interesting Man In The World

i'll probably have no reason to leave the house today morning shower averted

i'll probably have no reason to leave the house today morning shower averted   Foul Bachelor Frog

Set alarm for 8am wake up naturally at 7.59

Set alarm for 8am wake up naturally at 7.59  Success Kid

pants fold weirdly at the zipper everyone must think its an erection

pants fold weirdly at the zipper everyone must think its an erection  Paranoid Parrot

If jimmy cracked corn and no one cared Why is there a song about it?

If jimmy cracked corn and no one cared Why is there a song about it?  Philosoraptor

Sells itself with whole grains has as much sugar as a candy bar

Sells itself with whole grains has as much sugar as a candy bar  Scumbag cerel