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Get me pregnant So when you go to college, you can't break up with me.

Get me pregnant So when you go to college, you can't break up with me. Overly Attached Girlfriend
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388,809 shares

My house is so new That my car's gps can't find it

My house is so new That my car's gps can't find it First World Problems
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538,387 shares

Thinks up amazingly witty and sarcastic response stutters and mixes up words saying it

Thinks up amazingly witty and sarcastic response stutters and mixes up words saying it Socially Awesome Awkward Penguin
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565,682 shares

IF you're driving behind a Buick and you need to be somewhere You're gonna have a bad time

IF you're driving behind a Buick and you need to be somewhere You're gonna have a bad time Super Cool Ski Instructor
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73,684 shares

thinks she is punk because she listens to green day

thinks she is punk because she listens to green day Musically Oblivious 8th Grader
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144,983 shares

Dude, tennis is like giant ping-pong

Dude, tennis is like giant ping-pong 10 Guy
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84,112 shares

First Aid Kit? You mean Jack Daniel's

First Aid Kit? You mean Jack Daniel's overly manly man
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115,639 shares

I think your phone is broken It's not telling me your location anymore

I think your phone is broken It's not telling me your location anymore Overly Attached Girlfriend
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74,389 shares

why did the semen cross the road? i put the wrong sock on this morning

why did the semen cross the road? i put the wrong sock on this morning Foul Bachelor Frog
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104,270 shares

Bitches about big government spending Has received a welfare check every month for their entire life

Bitches about big government spending Has received a welfare check every month for their entire life Scumbag Steve
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58,095 shares