If a blind person takes acid What do they see?

If a blind person takes acid What do they see?  Philosoraptor

Go ahead. Try to lift me higher. I am infinite. I am eternal.

Go ahead. Try to lift me higher. I am infinite. I am eternal.   Try and you will fail

Hot chick asks me about my sex swing "Actually, it's for yoga"

Hot chick asks me about my sex swing

If you're making an embarassing purchase buy a birthday card at the same time and you can laugh it off as a gag gift

If you're making an embarassing purchase buy a birthday card at the same time and you can laugh it off as a gag gift  Actual Advice Mallard

every minus i see on your report card i minus one of your fingers

every minus i see on your report card i minus one of your fingers  High Expectations Asian Father

Brushed up against at concert immediately check pocket for wallet

Brushed up against at concert immediately check pocket for wallet  Paranoid Parrot

She doesn't like The headless bird I gave her

She doesn't like The headless bird I gave her  First World Problems Cat

spent too long on the toilet playing on my phone now my legs are asleep

spent too long on the toilet
playing on my phone now my legs are asleep  First World Problems

the crab is so raw It's still singing "under the sea"

the crab is so raw It's still singing

Research found that if you are afraid of spiders, you are more likely to find one in your bedroom. I'm really scared of Emma Watson

Research found that if you are afraid of spiders, you are more likely to find one in your bedroom. I'm really scared of Emma Watson   What are you scared of