Sheltering Suburban Mom

trophy wife

MARRIED HAS A BOYTOY Sheltering Suburban Mom

HOUSEWIFE IN SUBURBIA

YA KNOW THE GREAT SPIRIT BOUDOIR CAN BE FOUND ....EVEN IN SUBURBIA Sheltering Suburban Mom

Homophobic. Loves Ellen DeGeneres.

HOMOPHOBIC LOVES ELLEN DEGENERES Sheltering Suburban Mom

Nutritionist

DON'T EAT ANY BREAD TOMMY, CARBS MAKE YOU FAT. EAT SKITTLES INSTEAD, YOU NEED YOUR 5 A DAY. Sheltering Suburban Mom

Long grass

DON'T PLAY IN THAT FIELD TOMMY. THEY HAVEN'T CUT THE GRASS YET. Sheltering Suburban Mom

I sometimes can't understand her

DOESN'T WANT US TO WATCH ACTION BECAUSE IT'S VIOLENT FORCES US TO WATCH PASSION OF CHRIST Sheltering Suburban Mom

ohh say thank yu

YOUR MAN ASKED ME TO DO GYMNASTICS ON THE DICK LAST NIGHT BUT I TURNED HIM DOWN, SAY THANK YOU BITCH  Sheltering Suburban Mom

run in with the law

KIDS AT THE PARK DON'T WANT TO PLAY SOCCER BUT MY SON DOES CALLS COPS Sheltering Suburban Mom

humping the sign

SHE WAS CAUGHT NAKED HUMPING A STOP SIGN Sheltering Suburban Mom

Therapy issue

SPENDS MY ENTIRE LIFE PUTTING ME DOWN AT HOME, RARELY LET'S ME GO, GETS FRUSTRATED WHEN I HAVE FRIENDS, AND ALWAYS WANTS ME TO STAY AT HOME, BECAME PRETTY SHY, INSECURE, AND SOMETIMES IRRITATING.