Paranoid Parrot

accidentally sleep in on 4/20 they all think I'm toking

accidentally sleep in on 4/20 they all think I'm toking  Paranoid Parrot

First date with girl. Scratches her inner thigh. HERPES

First date with girl. Scratches her inner thigh. HERPES  Paranoid Parrot

Leave water bottle in a public place Someone pissed in it

Leave water bottle in a public place Someone pissed in it  Paranoid Parrot

Left a drink on the table at the club while we went to dance. Don't drink any more of it! Someone put GHB in it!

Left a drink on the table at the club while we went to dance. Don't drink any more of it!
Someone put GHB in it!  Paranoid Parrot

Not sure which cup is mine get new cup for the 4th time

Not sure which cup is mine get new cup for the 4th time  Paranoid Parrot

take shower constantly check corners of the ceiling for spiders

take shower constantly check corners of the ceiling for spiders  Paranoid Parrot

Roll over in bed and it squeaks everyone in house thinks i'm masturbating

Roll over in bed and it squeaks  everyone in house thinks i'm masturbating   Paranoid Parrot

HOUSEMATES TALKING IN HALLWAY THEY'RE PLOTTING AGAINST ME

HOUSEMATES TALKING IN HALLWAY THEY'RE PLOTTING AGAINST ME  Paranoid Parrot

Embarrassing song starts playing on iPod Everyone heard it through the earbuds

Embarrassing song starts playing on iPod Everyone heard it through the earbuds  Paranoid Parrot

run fingers through hair, one strand of hair comes out I'm going bald

run fingers through hair, one strand of hair comes out I'm going bald  Paranoid Parrot