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Actual Advice Mallard

If a girl asks you to get something out of her purse Bring the whole purse, that bitch is a labyrinth inside

If a girl asks you to get something out of her purse Bring the whole purse, that bitch is a labyrinth inside Actual Advice Mallard
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498,865 shares

If you're ever pulled over at night, turn on your dome lights. It's a courtesy that shows you have nothing to hide, puts the officer at ease and may help you get away with only a warning.

If you're ever pulled over at night, turn on your dome lights. It's a courtesy that shows you have nothing to hide, puts the officer at ease and may help you get away with only a warning. Actual Advice Mallard
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170,724 shares

Eating cheetos at the computer? Use Chopsticks. It keeps the orange off your hands

Eating cheetos at the computer? Use Chopsticks. It keeps the orange off your hands Actual Advice Mallard
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65,770 shares

Sober Thoughts Are drunk words

Sober Thoughts Are drunk words Actual Advice Mallard
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58,364 shares

Don't know whether to write affect or effect? Use impact instead

Don't know whether to write affect or effect? Use impact instead Actual Advice Mallard
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291,856 shares

if you see someone wearing the same thing they wore yesterday don't tell them, they know

if you see someone wearing the same thing they wore yesterday don't tell them, they know Actual Advice Mallard
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537,631 shares

Never. Ever. Ever. Get the name of someone you're dating tattooed on your body.

Never. Ever. Ever. Get the name of someone you're dating tattooed on your body. Actual Advice Mallard
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189,275 shares

tip your bartenders They will remember who you are, provide faster service, and make better drinks

tip your bartenders They will remember who you are, provide faster service, and make better drinks Actual Advice Mallard
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223,207 shares

Dont ignore a homeless person asking for money simply say "not today, sorry". Ignoring them dehumanizes them and makes it harder for them to make their way back into society

Dont ignore a homeless person asking for money simply say
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165,840 shares

Want to avoid drunk-texting your ex-gf? Delete her number.

Want to avoid drunk-texting your ex-gf? Delete her number. Actual Advice Mallard
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264,456 shares