Read David Foster Wallace Be the only person who does

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Read David Foster Wallace Be the only person who does

Your job opportunities: teacher or homeless person with unusually large vocabulary

Work at Starbucks

Study 18th century seduction lyric Use as pickup line

disagree on the use of the serial comma end friendship

Masturbate To georges bataille

Discuss graphic rape scene with professor three times your age Not awkward

talk about trope of professor-student seduction In professor-student office hours

discuss graphic sex scene with professor 3x your age not awkward

Listen to the decemberists Understand every word

Talked at by professor in Anglo-Saxon for 50 minutes Best lecture ever

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Read David Foster Wallace Be the only person who does

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