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"In this moment, I am euphoric. Not because of any phony god's blessing. But because, I am enlightened by my own intelligence." -Aalewis

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326 shares

Gets letter from crush on valentine's day restraining order

Gets letter from crush on valentine's day restraining order
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182,013 shares

woke up to a blowjob fell asleep with his mouth open

woke up to a blowjob fell asleep with his mouth open
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86,197 shares

hires a stripper for a party mom shows up

hires a stripper for a party mom shows up
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21,236 shares

Friend-Zoned By the God damned OAG

Friend-Zoned By the God damned OAG
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16,772 shares

leaves car unlocked in case of polar bears car gets broken into and shit in

leaves car unlocked in case of polar bears car gets broken into and shit in
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12,251 shares

hasn't played games in a long time, decides to try playing a new one simcity

hasn't played games in a long time, decides to try playing a new one simcity
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11,211 shares

Makes Harlem Shake Video Has seizure when bass drops

Makes Harlem Shake Video Has seizure when bass drops
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3,123 shares

Wins 3 ranked games in a row Ranked issue causes LP not to change

Wins 3 ranked games in a row Ranked issue causes LP not to change
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2,860 shares

Immortal is trapped in a slab of concrete

Immortal is trapped in a slab of concrete
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763 shares

Can see in 3D for first time in his life Has to sleep 23 hours a day to maintain memory circuits

Can see in 3D for first time in his life Has to sleep 23 hours a day to maintain memory circuits
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699 shares

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