owns and wears a pair of red cowboy boots still gets laid

owns and wears a pair of red cowboy boots still gets laid - owns and wears a pair of red cowboy boots still gets laid  Scumbag Ted Mosby

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Tells kids about every sexual experience him and his friends had won't tell them he smoked weed.

Tells kids about every sexual experience him and his friends had won't tell them he smoked weed.

Kids already know who their mother is keeps it a surprise anyway

Kids already know who their mother is keeps it a surprise anyway

Starts to tell story ...but we'll get to that

Starts to tell story ...but we'll get to that

And kids, thats how i met your mother but im still in love with robin

And kids, thats how i met your mother but im still in love with robin

Spends 8 seasons hiding his drug use Tells kids Marshall dropped Italian to get high.

Spends 8 seasons hiding his drug use Tells kids Marshall dropped Italian to get high.

Gets left at the alter, overcome by depression Turns the tables on some random guy

Gets left at the alter, overcome by depression Turns the tables on some random guy

Forces kids to listen to his story Story is 77 hours long

Forces kids to listen to his story Story is 77 hours long

Is an architect Can't build a table

Is an architect Can't build a table

Uncle Marshall, Aunt Lily, Aunt Robin, Uncle Barney My sister Heather

Uncle Marshall, Aunt Lily, Aunt Robin, Uncle Barney My sister Heather

tells kids about his drinking experiences and sex life won't tell them he cussed

tells kids about his drinking experiences and sex life won't tell them he cussed
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