"Press your backslash key. Oh, you don't know the backslash key? Do the normal backslash...but the one that goes the other way."

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Internet running slow? Better get a surge protector

Internet running slow? Better get a surge protector

New HD TV? Will only work with diamond encrusted HDMI Cable

New HD TV? Will only work with diamond encrusted HDMI Cable

You want microsoft office? That's pretty advanced. We can install it for $50.

You want microsoft office? That's pretty advanced. We can install it for $50.

DVD Tray Stuck? New motherboard!

DVD Tray Stuck? New motherboard!

empties recycle bin "$99.99 tune-up"

empties recycle bin

Headphones not working? New graphics card

Headphones not working? New graphics card

Keyboard Sticking? Better wipe all your data.

Keyboard Sticking? Better wipe all your data.

Oh, your browser has 30 cookies? Better get a $300 virus removal service

Oh, your browser has 30 cookies? Better get a $300 virus removal service

"No ma'am, we don't look at personal files during a back-up" saves nudes you took for your ex on flash drive

Linux system? I don't know, I heard they get viruses a lot.

Linux system? I don't know, I heard they get viruses a lot.
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