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The Most Interesting Man In The World
I don't always let strangers in my house to view items I am selling. but when I do, I make sure to carry two knives in my pockets
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I don’t always shake my maracas, But when it’s Caroline’s bachelorette fiesta, I shake them hard
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I don't always get to celebrate my first Cake Day but when I do, it falls on Easter
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I don't always browse reddit when i'm extremely tired but when I do, I always forget to upvote and downvote
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I don't always suck dick but when I do, it's my own
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I don't always thank my law enforcement But when I do, I let every single officer involved tell me how they couldn't be prouder
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I don't always have to pee right after sex but when I do, it ends up all over the bathroom
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I don't always give case studies for homework But when I do, I make them look like the Scramble game from the Sunday paper
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I don't always comment but when I do, i ninja edit it repeatedly in the first three minutes and pray no one noticed
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I don't always watch commercials but when I do, I repeat the corny sayings out loud to myself
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