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The Most Interesting Man In The World
I don't always go to ikea but when I do, i end up spending much more than i anticipated
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I don't always pull april fools pranks but when I do, everything goes horribly wrong, feelings are hurt and everyone involved feels awkward
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I don't always have to pee in the middle of the night but when I do, I run into everything
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I don't always listen to pantera but when I do, so do my neighbours
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I don't always sniff my toilet paper after wiping, Just kidding, I always do.
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I don't always check my bag but when I do, there's beer in it
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I don't usually read r/worldnews but when I do I realize i want to read r/news
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I don't always pick out apples but when I do, I touch every single one
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I don't always miss my cakeday but when I do I know I wasn't going to get any karma anyways
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I once wrestled an anaconda for an hour Then realizes I was masturbating.
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