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Success Kid

Nervously call work saying I'll be late for my shift "Thats perfect, didn't need you here for another 45 mins anyway"

Nervously call work saying I'll be late for my shift
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Walked home from the bar after halftime didn't miss any of the game

Walked home from the bar after halftime didn't miss any of the game Success Kid
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Went to the barber today She didn't screw up my haircut

Went to the barber today She didn't screw up my haircut Success Kid
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Pulled last of toilet paper off roll in a public restroom Exactly what I needed

Pulled last of toilet paper off roll in a public restroom Exactly what I needed Success Kid
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goes to email to inform lecture of fake illness lecture is cancelled

goes to email to inform lecture of fake illness lecture is cancelled Success Kid
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Girlfriend was on her period all week Ends on Valentine's Day

Girlfriend was on her period all week Ends on Valentine's Day Success Kid
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Preheated Cast Iron House smells like bacon

Preheated Cast Iron House smells like bacon Success Kid
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never had to fuck anyone to pay my rent

never had to fuck anyone to pay my rent Success Kid
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Did laundry All my socks matched

Did laundry All my socks matched Success Kid
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Ate a big lunch favorite stall is available for me to poop in

Ate a big lunch favorite stall is available for me to poop in Success Kid
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