Story Time Jesus

Dude, seriously? Bunny rabbits and decorative eggs? no wonder atheism is on the rise.

Dude, seriously?
Bunny rabbits and decorative eggs? no wonder atheism is on the rise.  Story Time Jesus

And Moses was like "Dude, check out this burning bush!" So I said "Yeah, that's what she said, bro..."

And Moses was like

yo jared my nigga happy birthday yo!

yo jared my nigga happy birthday yo!  Story Time Jesus

Then they gave me a crown of thorns and whipped me it was so hot I came twice

Then they gave me a crown of thorns and whipped me it was so hot I came twice  Story Time Jesus

Only I Can bring your memes back.

Only I Can bring your memes back.   Story Time Jesus

"A bottle of wine contains more philosophy than all the books in the world" ~Jesus H. Christ

Go forth And herp derp

Go forth And herp derp  Story Time Jesus

And I said 'If you invest in me you will see an awesome prophet'. lol Yeah, fuck you guys. I'm jesus. I don't do jokes, just magic.

And I said 'If you invest in me you will see an awesome prophet'. lol Yeah, fuck you guys. I'm jesus. I don't do jokes, just magic.  Story Time Jesus

y entonces mi papa creo a adan y eva por que chabelo estaba muy solo.

y entonces mi papa creo a adan y eva por que chabelo estaba muy solo.   Story Time Jesus

So this guy is complaining about our team in pvp, and he sucks! so i'm like "bro, do you even rift?"

So this guy is complaining about our team in pvp, and he sucks! so i'm like
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