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Socially Awkward Penguin

Been to the front page Same number of times I've had a girlfriend

Been to the front page Same number of times I've had a girlfriend Socially Awkward Penguin
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cute Girl at work says "All men are arrogant about being good in bed" "I suck in bed."

cute Girl at work says
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Cute coworker walks into my office while I'm scratching my crotch Immediately switch to picking my nose as though I thought it was less awkward

Cute coworker walks into my office while I'm scratching my crotch Immediately switch to picking my nose as though I thought it was less awkward Socially Awkward Penguin
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Needs to mow the lawn, notices the neighbors enjoying a family backyard barbeque cuts front and side yards, waits nervously until barbeque ends to cut the backyard

Needs to mow the lawn, notices the neighbors enjoying a family backyard barbeque cuts front and side yards, waits nervously until barbeque ends to cut the backyard Socially Awkward Penguin
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Waitress mishears order, brings food to table. "Thank you"

Waitress mishears order, brings food to table.
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Driving home, realize you are following someone Take Long way home

Driving home, realize you are following someone Take Long way home Socially Awkward Penguin
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Someone offers chewing gum Say no although wants it

Someone offers chewing gum Say no although wants it Socially Awkward Penguin
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makes an okcupid profile checks for replies every 20 seconds

makes an okcupid profile checks for replies every 20 seconds Socially Awkward Penguin
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I don't always comment on a facebook post but when i do, the next comment is "!!!GTfo!!!"

I don't always comment on a facebook post but when i do, the next comment is
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only available bus seats are next to other people i'll just stand

only available bus seats are next to other people i'll just stand Socially Awkward Penguin
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