Sheltering Suburban Mom

Says "Being a Mom is the best job on Earth." Nags husband to get his ass home by 6 so she can dump kids on him and get drunk with girlfriends

Says

Yells at you to go play outside Stays in all day and watches All My Children reruns.

Yells at you to go play outside Stays in all day and watches All My Children reruns.  Sheltering Suburban Mom

"It's awful how some mothers raise their children." 8-year-old is wearing a push-up bra.

Tells kids it's what's inside that counts Fake tits

Tells kids it's what's inside that counts Fake tits  Sheltering Suburban Mom

Reads about autism on the internet Decides that everyone she knows is autistic

Reads about autism on the internet Decides that everyone she knows is autistic  Sheltering Suburban Mom

Gets 600 channel TV subscription only watches HGTV

Gets 600 channel TV subscription only watches HGTV  Sheltering Suburban Mom

Write "Check Id" on Credit Cards Bitch when chasier asks to see id

Write

locks you in your room when she finds you smoking at 25 has been secretly smoking at work for 20 years

locks you in your room when she finds you smoking at 25 has been secretly smoking at work for 20 years  Sheltering Suburban Mom

wants "the best for her kids" smoked and drank while pregnant with you at 18

wants

Son asks to go to new friend's house to hang out First question: "What do his parents do for a living?"

Son asks to go to new friend's house to hang out First question:
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