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Scumbag Brain

differentiates between everything easily except faces

differentiates between everything easily except faces Scumbag Brain
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Go to the store to get milk Come back with everything you need BUT milk

Go to the store to get milk Come back with everything you need BUT milk Scumbag Brain
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At Doctor's office getting your prostate exam thinks about hot girl you had sex with last night

At Doctor's office getting your prostate exam thinks about hot girl you had sex with last night Scumbag Brain
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Has girlfriend: I really wish I were single Is Single: I really wish I had a girlfriend

Has girlfriend: I really wish I were single Is Single: I really wish I had a girlfriend Scumbag Brain
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PASSES UP SPONTANEOUS SEXUAL ENCOUNTER WITH A STRANGER BECAUSE YOU LOVE YOUR GIRLFRIEND DOESN'T REALIZE YOU'RE DREAMING

PASSES UP SPONTANEOUS SEXUAL ENCOUNTER WITH A STRANGER BECAUSE YOU LOVE YOUR GIRLFRIEND DOESN'T REALIZE YOU'RE DREAMING Scumbag Brain
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ON WEEKDAYS: "DAMN, I'M EXHAUSTED. I CAN'T WAIT TO GET SOME SLEEP THIS WEEKEND." ON WEEKENDS: "WOO! I CAN FINALLY STAY UP AND DO ALL THE FUN CRAP I DON'T USUALLY HAVE TIME TO DO."

ON WEEKDAYS:
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feeling bad about yourself because you are overweight and out of shape? let's cheer up with a piece of chocolate cake and a pint of haagen dazs in front of the tv

feeling bad about yourself because you are overweight and out of shape? let's cheer up with a piece of chocolate cake and a pint of haagen dazs in front of the tv Scumbag Brain
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Doesn't read entire map of reddit Upvotes anyways

Doesn't read entire map of reddit Upvotes anyways Scumbag Brain
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First day of class is tomorrow? Good time for an acne outbreak

First day of class is tomorrow? Good time for an acne outbreak Scumbag Brain
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Is dry I'm sad now Goes to r/trees

Is dry I'm sad now Goes to r/trees Scumbag Brain
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