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Paranoid Parrot

girlfriend hanging out with friends later tonight? tonight is the night she cheats on me.

girlfriend hanging out with friends later tonight? tonight is the night she cheats on me. Paranoid Parrot
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3,073 shares

Dick touches edge of toilet seat AIDS

Dick touches edge of toilet seat AIDS Paranoid Parrot
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3,068 shares

Bosses are in a meeting together i'm getting fired

Bosses are in a meeting together i'm getting fired Paranoid Parrot
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3,066 shares

Came into the room, forgot why Oh God, the Silence!

Came into the room, forgot why Oh God, the Silence! Paranoid Parrot
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3,038 shares

crush talking to girl they're going to get married and i'm going to die alone

crush talking to girl they're going to get married and i'm going to die alone Paranoid Parrot
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3,005 shares

FRIEND POSTS VAGUE, ANGRY FACEBOOK STATUS IT'S ABOUT ME

FRIEND POSTS VAGUE, ANGRY FACEBOOK STATUS IT'S ABOUT ME Paranoid Parrot
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2,998 shares

Goes into men's bathroom quickly check for urinals to make sure you didn't enter ladies room by mistake

Goes into men's bathroom quickly check for urinals to make sure you didn't enter ladies room by mistake Paranoid Parrot
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2,992 shares

Puts 5 alarm times on phone before bed Keeps waking up checking that the alarms are set

Puts 5 alarm times on phone before bed Keeps waking up checking that the alarms are set Paranoid Parrot
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2,991 shares

Wants to make a meme goes through 100 pages of r/adviceanimals to make sure it hadn't been done

Wants to make a meme goes through 100 pages of r/adviceanimals to make sure it hadn't been done Paranoid Parrot
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2,990 shares

always chooses the seat where no one can see what I'm doing

always chooses the seat where no one can see what I'm doing Paranoid Parrot
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2,984 shares

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