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Paranoid Parrot

boyfriend lasts a long time during sex He must think I'm unattractive

boyfriend lasts a long time during sex He must think I'm unattractive Paranoid Parrot
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3,705 shares

Accidently hit the unlock button on my car key remote Even though car is miles away, hits the lock button just in case

Accidently hit the unlock button on my car key remote Even though car is miles away, hits the lock button just in case Paranoid Parrot
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3,697 shares

Asked to Register Pirated Software Throw out computer

Asked to Register Pirated Software Throw out computer Paranoid Parrot
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3,672 shares

won't post picture on LGBT subreddits someone will recognize me, i'll be outed

won't post picture on LGBT subreddits someone will recognize me, i'll be outed Paranoid Parrot
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3,656 shares

CAR BEHIND MAKES SAME TURNING AS YOU UNDERCOVER AGENTS

CAR BEHIND MAKES SAME TURNING AS YOU UNDERCOVER AGENTS Paranoid Parrot
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3,649 shares

Carry iPhone. Apple knows everywhere I've been!

Carry iPhone. Apple knows everywhere I've been! Paranoid Parrot
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3,587 shares

Writes comment Pastes it in google to make sure there are no spelling mistakes

Writes comment Pastes it in google to make sure there are no spelling mistakes Paranoid Parrot
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3,561 shares

Nauseated Pregnant

Nauseated Pregnant Paranoid Parrot
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3,552 shares

Passes Cop. Going speed limit. seatbelt on. both hands on wheel. not texting. Checks mirror for sirens

Passes Cop. Going speed limit. seatbelt on. both hands on wheel. not texting. Checks mirror for sirens Paranoid Parrot
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3,508 shares

Math Exam Tomorrow Set Five Different Alarms

Math Exam Tomorrow Set Five Different Alarms Paranoid Parrot
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3,487 shares

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