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Paranoid Parrot

Can't fart out here in public i'll just fart 700 times when i get home

Can't fart out here in public i'll just fart 700 times when i get home Paranoid Parrot
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Didn't post an interesting article on passive aggression on facebook Because I didn't want any of my friends to think I was passive aggressively calling them passive aggressive

Didn't post an interesting article on passive aggression on facebook Because I didn't want any of my friends to think I was passive aggressively calling them passive aggressive Paranoid Parrot
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TURNS LIGHTS OFF IN BASEMENT Run up stairs as fast as fucking possible

TURNS LIGHTS OFF IN BASEMENT Run up stairs as fast as fucking possible Paranoid Parrot
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Slight chest pain Web MD says AIDS.

Slight chest pain Web MD says AIDS. Paranoid Parrot
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taking shower with no one else in the house Psycho theme on loop in head

taking shower with no one else in the house Psycho theme on loop in head Paranoid Parrot
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See cop car change directions

See cop car change directions Paranoid Parrot
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on vacation Did i leave the oven on? did i lock the door? Did I turn the lights off? Did i leave the water running?

on vacation Did i leave the oven on? did i lock the door? Did I turn the lights off? Did i leave the water running? Paranoid Parrot
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"you swallow 7 spiders every year" sleep with duct tape over mouth
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What? I'm not paranoid! Which one of my enemies told you this?

What? I'm not paranoid! Which one of my enemies told you this? Paranoid Parrot
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Trouble swallowing? Cancer

Trouble swallowing? Cancer Paranoid Parrot
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