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Paranoid Parrot

Walks into public restroom immediately look for urinals to make sure in right one

Walks into public restroom immediately look for urinals to make sure in right one Paranoid Parrot
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5,957 shares

BREATHE IN SECONDHAND SMOKE LUNG CANCER

BREATHE IN SECONDHAND SMOKE LUNG CANCER Paranoid Parrot
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5,897 shares

Wife stops snoring She's dead

Wife stops snoring She's dead Paranoid Parrot
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5,889 shares

Have to piss in public restroom use stall incase murderer comes in,will last a few seconds longer than everyone else

Have to piss in public restroom use stall incase murderer comes in,will last a few seconds longer than everyone else Paranoid Parrot
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5,889 shares

Didn't file tax returns by deadline. Hear helicopters on April 16; government's coming for me!

Didn't file tax returns by deadline. Hear helicopters on April 16; government's coming for me! Paranoid Parrot
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5,775 shares

first vote is a downvote quick, delete the post

first vote is a downvote quick, delete the post Paranoid Parrot
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5,744 shares

Ctrl + C... Ctrl + C Ctrl + C Ctrl + C Ctrl + C Ctrl + C

Ctrl + C... Ctrl + C Ctrl + C Ctrl + C Ctrl + C Ctrl + C Paranoid Parrot
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5,711 shares

checks pockets after leaving store to make sure i didn't accidentally shoplift anything

checks pockets after leaving store to make sure i didn't accidentally shoplift anything Paranoid Parrot
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5,711 shares

Hear a Noise In Skyrim Crouch to see if you're being watched

Hear a Noise In Skyrim Crouch to see if you're being watched Paranoid Parrot
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5,709 shares

Teacher asks questions about presentation I'm gonna fail!

Teacher asks questions about presentation I'm gonna fail! Paranoid Parrot
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5,682 shares

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