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Paranoid Parrot

crossing one way street looks both ways just in case

crossing one way street looks both ways just in case Paranoid Parrot
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7,720 shares

lock the door of public toilet check if the door is locked

lock the door of public toilet check if the door is locked Paranoid Parrot
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7,695 shares

5 random people like a week old status on facebook in a matter of 2 minutes "What the fuck are they plotting"

5 random people like a week old status on facebook in a matter of 2 minutes
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7,641 shares

neighbor remarks on funny shirt i had on yesterday he's stalking me

neighbor remarks on funny shirt i had on yesterday he's stalking me Paranoid Parrot
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7,631 shares

Girlfriend doesn't reply to goodmorning text "I hope she isn't dead"

Girlfriend doesn't reply to goodmorning text
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7,620 shares

girl doesn't text back in five minutes she hates me

girl doesn't text back in five minutes she hates me Paranoid Parrot
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7,606 shares

Received homemade goodies in snack exchange. Secret Santa is trying to poison me!

Received homemade goodies in snack exchange. Secret Santa is trying to poison me! Paranoid Parrot
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7,581 shares

Smell something while driving. oh god car is on fire

Smell something while driving. oh god car is on fire Paranoid Parrot
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7,576 shares

Trash talking someone you know constantly check phone to be sure you didn't pocket dial them

Trash talking someone you know constantly check phone to be sure you didn't pocket dial them Paranoid Parrot
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7,485 shares

belt slaps urinal it's trash now

belt slaps urinal it's trash now Paranoid Parrot
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7,479 shares

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