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Confession Bear

When I first started masturbating I used to pretend I was in the backseat during a roadtrip with my older stepsisters and pretend they were forcing my hands down my pants while yelling "stop touching yourself!"

When I first started masturbating I used to pretend I was in the backseat during a roadtrip with my older stepsisters and pretend they were forcing my hands down my pants while yelling
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everyone knows I'm small no one knows Gimli is my ancestor

everyone knows I'm small no one knows Gimli is my ancestor Confession Bear
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I use this meme incorrectly because I hate it and want Reddit to turn against it

I use this meme incorrectly because I hate it and want Reddit to turn against it Confession Bear
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I support experimental testing on animals because it's better than trying it on people first

I support experimental testing on animals because it's better than trying it on people first Confession Bear
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I was actually glad when my girlfriend's pet died because it was from her ex

I was actually glad when my girlfriend's pet died because it was from her ex Confession Bear
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I like to date guys who fall madly in love with me and then break their hearts I like to see them suffer

I like to date guys who fall madly in love with me and then break their hearts I like to see them suffer Confession Bear
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I thought Han Solo was a douchebag.

I thought Han Solo was a douchebag. Confession Bear
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I tell my daughter to leave her husband but until she does, maybe he can sell my furniture online for me.

I tell my daughter to leave her husband but until she does, maybe he can sell my furniture online for me. Confession Bear
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I'm not good at explaining things to people, because I don't know how to 'dumb it down' so they will understand.

I'm not good at explaining things to people, because I don't know how to 'dumb it down' so they will understand. Confession Bear
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I'll be 35 this week and I still eat my boogers

I'll be 35 this week and I still eat my boogers Confession Bear
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