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Confession Bear
I don't care who my elected officials are because no matter what I'm still going to get fucked over
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got my money back on a defective fleshlight
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I always fart In my drunk patients' rooms
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I give a fake laugh whenever someone tells an unfunny joke So they don't feel embarrassed when nobody thinks they're funny
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I left a full trash can in my apartment when I left for the weekend When I got home, I tried to suck up the gnats with the vacuum hose
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I've been on Reddit for 2 years and don't know when my cake-day is
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In the last two years I have watched as reddit turned from a site closer in nature to 4chan into a site that's more similar to 9gag, and have come to despise it.
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One of my best friends accidentally revealed to me her username and now I check her submissions every day for r/gonewild posts so I can finally see her naked
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I think about cheating on my boyfriend with every single one of his male friends
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I sit down to piss just so i can browse reddit
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