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Confession Bear

I flush the toilet before I finish peeing

I flush the toilet before I finish peeing Confession Bear
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I cheated on my SO I don't feel bad

I cheated on my SO I don't feel bad Confession Bear
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If you argue for high capacity, full-auto weapons I think you're one step closer to hunting w/ atom bombs than I am

If you argue for high capacity, full-auto weapons I think you're one step closer to hunting w/ atom bombs than I am Confession Bear
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I fried my semen To see if it would cook like egg whites... It did.

I fried my semen To see if it would cook like egg whites... It did. Confession Bear
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When I read awesome stories on Reddit I tell them to people at work and pretend they happened to a friend of mine, because my life is that boring.

When I read awesome stories on Reddit I tell them to people at work and pretend they happened to a friend of mine, because my life is that boring. Confession Bear
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I sometimes like being sick So I don't have to do the 'kiss hello'

I sometimes like being sick So I don't have to do the 'kiss hello' Confession Bear
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IF YOUR SHITTY CIVIC IS LOUD AND ANNOYING I PURPOSELY FOIL ALL OF YOUR ATTEMPTS TO GET INTO MY LANE

IF YOUR SHITTY CIVIC IS LOUD AND ANNOYING I PURPOSELY FOIL ALL OF YOUR ATTEMPTS TO GET INTO MY LANE Confession Bear
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When I was a kid I preferred Digimon to Pokemon

When I was a kid I preferred Digimon to Pokemon Confession Bear
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I list myself as Native American on Job applications to get minority status and no one has ever had the guts to call me out

I list myself as Native American on Job applications to get minority status and no one has ever had the guts to call me out Confession Bear
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I look you up on Facebook If you're ugly, obese or seem annoying, I shred your resume.

I look you up on Facebook If you're ugly, obese or seem annoying, I shred your resume. Confession Bear
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