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Confession Bear
I told my gf the landlord was inspecting our house because i wanted her to clean the house
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I think fake tans make girls less attractive
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i wake up everyday thinking today is going to suck so i'm not upset when it does suck.
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I actually liked the stepped noses last year...
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My master's thesis is due tomorrow. Wife yells, "Get off Reddit and finish your work!"
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I don't remember throwing up in the washing machine last night
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I stick a paper towel in my butt before i work out to prevent my butt sweat from stinking up the gym.
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When I'm trying to get my own meme noticed I downvote everyone on the rising list
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I open the door for women going upstairs so I can stare at their ass.
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I told my friends today I'm coming clean that work has been a fake excuse because I'd actually rather just be alone.... Then I said, "April Fools" Except I'm not joking
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