Actual Advice Mallard

if you order pizza, and would like speedy service, be a good tipper. When drivers see the address of a good tipper, that order will always get delivered first, regardless of order of deliveries. notoriously bad tippers get their pizza last.

if you order pizza, and would like speedy service, be a good tipper. When drivers see the address of a good tipper, that order will always get delivered first, regardless of order of deliveries. notoriously bad tippers get their pizza last.  Actual Advice Mallard

   Actual Advice Mallard

Always tell medical personnel how much you really had to drink and if you're on drugs it's important to your care and it's illegal for us to talk to the cops about our patients anyway

Always tell medical personnel how much you really had to drink and if you're on drugs it's important to your care and it's illegal for us to talk to the cops about our patients anyway  Actual Advice Mallard

cheaters think everyone cheats liars think everyone lies

cheaters think everyone cheats liars think everyone lies  Actual Advice Mallard

If you want people to like you, don't try and make them feel sorry for you Make them feel good about themselves so they enjoy being around you

If you want people to like you, don't try and make them feel sorry for you Make them feel good about themselves so they enjoy being around you  Actual Advice Mallard

Ask to speak with the retention deptartment it's their job to offer free features and lower your bill

Ask to speak with the retention deptartment it's their job to offer free features and lower your bill  Actual Advice Mallard

You don't always have To fuck her hard

You don't always have To fuck her hard  Actual Advice Mallard

if she says "see if i care" she cares

if she says

When you move in to a place you're renting, take pictures of any and all damage. Then post them to Facebook so you can reference the upload date as proof that you didn't do that damage.

When you move in to a place you're renting, take pictures of any and all damage. Then post them to Facebook so you can reference the upload date as proof that you didn't do that damage.  Actual Advice Mallard

if your tongue ever gets stuck to a frozen pole don't panic cup your hands around your mouth and the pole and keep blowing hot air. after a while the pole will heat up enough for you to pull your tongue away safely

if your tongue ever gets stuck to a frozen pole don't panic cup your hands around your mouth and the pole and keep blowing hot air.  after a while the pole will heat up enough for you to pull your tongue away safely  Actual Advice Mallard
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